Looks are temporary


One of the popular myths out there right now is that we need to love how we look.

We're replacing the belief that if we get the ideal look everything will come our way with the belief that if we can only love how we look right now everything will suddenly work for us.

Both are problematic. Both are based on appearance ... and looks are temporary.

Even if we come to love ourselves just as we look right now, flaws and all, we're bound to change. And then we have to go through the process again and again and again of convincing ourselves we're worthy when looks and bodies and features change.

It isn't true that if we can come to love our pooch now we'll love our wrinkles later. It isn't true that if we come to love our freckles now we'll love our postpartum body later. That's not how this works.

Even if you love your appearance and body now - you think you look hot and love seeing yourself - the same holds true. You're loving a fleeting moment.

The women I know, have worked with, and look up to don't place an importance on loving how they look. Sometimes they do love their appearance. Sometimes they don't. But, more importantly, they've found their place and worth and confidence from what's true to them and who they are.

So, if you're fighting to love how you look right now know that it's not the thing you need to fight for. Fighting to put less emphasis on appearance and its importance in your life and sense of self will serve you far better.

Jessica Jo Fisher